She is love
by peytonscott87
Summary: I've been beaten down, i've been kicked around but she takes it all for me, and I lost my faith in my darkest days, she makes me want to believe" Series 4 from Cook's perspective mainly his relationship with Naomi. Cook/Naomi Naomily of course! , Ceffy


**Pairing: **Naomi/Cook Naomi/Emily  
**Rating: **T for swearing  
**Summary: **"It was you who picked the pieces up, when I was a broken soul and pieced me back together, returned to me what others stole"

**A/N: **Okay so you got me, Cook/Naomi are my guilty pleasure but in no way shape or form do I prefer them over Naomi and Emily, just wanted to put that out there. So yes please read and review, let me know what you think.

They become something of friends over the summer when he gets back from visiting his dad. He feels alone, Freddie and Effy take off again for a while leaving him in fucking Bristol alone to stew and fester in his own self-pity. Cook can't help it, can't help but feel his stomach twist and churn at the thought of Freddie's hands on Effy tracing lines Cook knows all to well. He spends the first couple nights getting completely fucked, starting fights and being thrown out of whatever shit hole he has decided to go to on that particular evening. It's not till one warm Friday night that things start to change; he's out again drunkenly grinding up against some random on the dance floor when he looks over and sees them for the first time since he got back. He had heard from JJ that Naomi and Emily had finally sorted things out, finds himself smiling at the sight of the two of them in the middle of the crowd of people dancing close together giggling between kisses like they couldn't give a shit about the world around them. It's not long before his mind wanders to Effy, starts wondering if Freddie and Effy are acting the same way somewhere at this very moment. Gets the familiar clenching in his heart, like its turning over in his chest, and heads to the bar trying desperately to numb it with more alcohol.

It's about an hour later when he's still standing at the bar that he feels a tap on his shoulders. Cook turns around slowly and is met with Naomi's bright blonde hair and blue eyes, a crooked smile hanging on her lips and he can't help but grin back at her. He's always liked Naomi, she always struck him as strong, independent and so fucking clever, of course it didn't hurt that she wasn't hard on the eyes either.

"Emerging back in to society are we?" Naomi says, her voice full of mocking, eyes twinkling with humor.

"Fucking hell Naomikins its been ages," Cook bellows picking her up in a big hug when he sees her roll her eyes at his nick name for her, makes a mental note to call her that from now on," So I see you finally gave in to the lezzars advances? But Cookies back now if you wanted to give it another go, you know you really should see more cock."

Naomi just glares playfully at him goes to answer but doesn't get the chance.

"That wont be necessary," Emily answers for her, wrapping her arms around Naomi's back pressing a soft kiss to her shoulder," She's satisfied, or at least the sounds she makes suggest she is."

And Emily actually fucking winks at Naomi, whose just smirking like a fucking idiot and for a second Cook thinks he's stepped into an alternate universe or some shit. One where Emily is confidant and Naomi isn't scowling all the time; it throws him for a loop for a minute before he's broken from his thoughts as Naomi wraps her arm around Emily and pulls her in for a kiss.

"Fucking ace fancy a threesome then?" Cook laughs gesturing to his pants," Or I can just watch, I wouldn't be opposed to that."

"Fuck off," both girls say in unison

"Just putting it out there," Cook grins turning to the bartender and ordering three pints, passing one to each of them when he brings them over.

"Thanks," Naomi says after taking a sip," So where's Freds? Or Effy I haven't seen them here anywhere tonight." Naomi asks turning her head to scan the club.

Cooks face visibly drops for a moment, hopes neither of them notices, though judging by the sad look in Naomi's eyes she must have.

"Off fucking somewhere," Cook tries to sound nonchalant, tries not to let on that it burns to say those words," They didn't come back with me, I suppose Ef finally made her choice."

Naomi looks down for a minute, and then looks over at Emily who isn't paying attention to the conversation, just innocently bobbing her head to the music. When she looks back up to meet Cooks eyes he sees something in them, looks like understanding but that can't be it because Naomi fucking got the girl after all, its nothing the same.

"I'm sorry Cook," Naomi says sincerely, and he believes her even though he knows that she had been most likely rooting for Freddie like the rest of them.

He doesn't read to much into it, just shakes his head and tries not to notice how fucking expressive Naomi's eyes can be when she tries, like he can see everything she's thinking. Tries to stop thinking that its so different than Effy's eyes, Naomi's open stare contrasting starkly with Effy's mysterious gaze that you could never quite read.

"Babe I'm not here for a pity party I'm here for a party, now lets get fucking mental," Cook shouts downing his pint and grabbing Emily's hand dragging her towards the dance floor knowing that Naomi would follow in seconds.

They dance and Cook kind of feels like he's healing with every beat that rattles through his body, for the first time in a week he doesn't feel the urge to get pissed to the point of not being able to stand. Just dances and enjoys the company of his friends, laying down his burden for the evening and having a good time.

Naomi insists that he comes back to hers with them when they leave a little later on. He tries to argue, insists that he's sure Naomi's mum wouldn't be pleased with her bringing home a drunk guy to sleep on their sofa. Naomi explain that she has her own flat now so it wont be a problem and Cook doesn't argue anymore, he really doesn't want to go back to his shit hole of a room anyways. Naomi tosses him a pillow and a blanket and points to the couch, which he gratefully accepts and then watches as Emily whispers something in Naomi's ear with her eyebrow cocked that actually makes Naomi blush. Watches with a grin as Emily leads Naomi up the stairs to their room, at least someone's getting lucky he thinks as he closes his eyes and drifts off to sleep.

Its starts out like that, the three of them going out and getting fucked together, sometimes joined by Pandora and Thomas. Doing shots and dancing, watching as Emily gains more confidence with the more alcohol she consumes and drags a very flushed looking Naomi to the toilets, smirking even wider when they come back and Naomi has a red mark already forming on her neck. The two of them seem completely oblivious to the amount of male attention they attract, Cook takes it upon himself to tell any bloke who seems to be getting ideas to fuck the hell off. Then they head back to Naomi's and he plunks down on the green couch like many nights before this one and falls asleep as Naomi and Emily disappear upstairs.

One particular night is different though, they go out as usual but Naomi just doesn't seem the same. He senses some tension, not sure where it's coming from but its there in the air and Emily seems to notice too. They head home early that night none of them really feeling the club and for once Naomi lingers at the bottom of the stairs when Emily kisses her on the cheek and whispers good night. Naomi kisses her on the forehead and says she's going to stay up for a while longer and Emily nods silently before continuing on her path.

"Beer?" Naomi walks into the living room carrying two and holding one out to Cook.

"Thanks," he says taking it from her.

She sits in the chair, stares off into space and drinks silently and its like he can see the wheels turning in her head, can't help but wonder what has got her so tense.

"You gonna tell me what's up?" Cook says after a long silence.

She looks over at him for a minute, eye's narrowing as if she's trying to evaluate whether it's a good idea to open up to him or not. He's not sure if it's a good sign when she looks away again, face relaxing as she takes another long sip of her beer.

"My dad is a dick," She blurts out a moment later," He's such a fucking prick and there's nothing I can do about it."

Cook nods along, had no idea how much him and Naomi had in common.

"What did he do," Cook says, tries not to sound to curious though he really just wants to feel that he isn't alone in this respect, wants to know that he's not the only one with a father that could give less of a shit about him.

"Fucked off," Naomi says, still not meeting his eyes. For a minute Cook wonders if its because she's crying but then she looks over and her eyes are dry, just sad looking and then he remembers that he's talking to Naomi and not Emily, she doesn't wear her emotions on her sleeve quite like her girlfriend," Left my mum when he found out she was pregnant, left her with fucking nothing."

She takes a long deep breath and another sip of her beer before continuing.

"He called today, his monthly fucking phone call, couldn't stop talking about his new family it just pissed me off is all," Naomi shrugs looking over to Cook for some reaction.

"We're one in the same Naomikins," Cook says after a minute, Naomi eyes him curiously," My dads a big cunt as well. Fucked off when I was young, then mum went a bit mental drinking, fucking around then she kicked me out. And people wonder why I'm such a prick, just look what I've come from."

"You're not a prick Cook," Naomi says seriously, Cook looks at her searching for pity on her face but he doesn't find it, it looks like she actually means it.

Wonders what it is about Naomi that coerces him to drop his front, doesn't understand it at all but whenever he's around her he just doesn't feel the need to put on his cocky bravado. Thinks that maybe Naomi is the only person who really knows who he really is.

"I went to see him you know, when me and Ef took off we went to see him," Cook admits.

"How did that go," Naomi says, sounds like she's actually listening something Cook isn't used to.

"Complete shit, some shit went down and he basically told me to fuck off and that he never wanted me in the first place," Cook explains," But I figure fuck it, fuck him right if he doesn't give a shit about me when I don't give a shit about him."

Naomi nods along with his logic for a minute.

"Only that sometimes you can't help but give a shit," Naomi says and Cook knows its true.

"Parents, they really fuck you up don't they," Cook laughs before taking a long sip of his beer.

"Tell me about it, my mum is fucking Kieran," Naomi laughs despite herself when Cook's eyes go big," Yes Kieran from our form."

"Right on Naomikins," Cook grins.

"Fucks sake we're quite the pair aren't we," Naomi points out seconds later.

"You could say that," Cook agrees

"Well I should be off to bed," Naomi says getting up from her chair," Listen, I haven't told Emily about any of this yet…"

"My lips are sealed," Cook assures her

"Thanks," Naomi nods before making her way up to her room.

Cook quickly finishes his beer and lies back on the couch. Doesn't know how he feels about the fact that Naomi had shared something so personal with him, something she hadn't even told Emily yet. Feels somewhat special despite himself, feels nice to be trusted again to be needed, he hasn't felt that way in sometime. Before he drifts off to sleep he realizes the reason why he doesn't have to act in front of Naomi, why he's able to open up to her in a way that he was never able to do with anyone, not even JJ Freddie or even Effy if he was honest with himself. He finally sees thats its because they really are the same. She understands him in a way that no one in his life ever has and the realization shakes him a minute before he takes a deep breath and accepts it, accepts that its not so terrible to let someone in after all.

Things change after that night, he comes around more often and they go out less. Finds that every once in a while its just nice to sit around and enjoy good company rather than going to a loud pub where you have to scream to have a decent conversation. He's stopped arguing to himself that him and Naomi, and Emily for that matter are just drinking buddies, has accepted that they are friends now and good friends at that. And its nice he thinks when they actually look happy when he pops round, and isn't sure what to feel when they give him a key and tell him he's welcome to stay anytime.

When Emily's around she'll cook them dinner and they'll sit down like Bristol's strangest family and eat together. And he finds it completely fucking odd how easily Naomi has slipped into domestic life, how she'll clear the table afterwards and wash the dishes, how she offers to help Emily cook and starts making a salad grinning like a fool when Emily rewards her with a kiss. Wonders if him and Effy would have ended up like that if she had made a different decision in the end.

It's a Thursday night when he sees Freddie for the first time since he left him and Effy when they got off his dads boat. Naomi's having a barbecue and out of nowhere JJ walks in with Freddie walking awkwardly a couple steps behind him. Emily's smiles and instantly runs over and gives him a hug, as does Katie and Panda but Naomi just sits there a minute next to Cook on the lounge chairs. He feels her place her hand on his for a brief moment, almost as if to say "Im here" before she pulls herself up and walks over to say hello as well. Cook just waits, biting the inside of his cheek in anticipation of Effy gliding her way in and tearing apart the world he had just started to build again, but much to his surprise it never happens. Freddie does walk over to him after about an hour of shooting him awkward glances across the backyard as if attempting to conjure up the courage to speak to him.

"Cook mate," Freddie says inching closer before eventually sitting down in the chair next to him," How's your summer?"

"Just fucking brilliant, just fucking love getting my heart ripped out and stomped on by my best friend and the girl I love," Cook thinks bitterly.

"Mint, shagging girls and hanging with two fucking hot lezzars, what more could Cookie ask for," Cook replies faking a grin," Where's the mrs?"

Freddie looks away a minute and Cook just knows, knows that Effy has fucked off and left him a sad and broken. The truth was she just wasn't ready for a love like Freddie's, so full on and intense. But Cook had witnessed Naomi get over her fears with Emily because she loved her, and he couldn't help but think that Effy couldn't love Freddie that much if she wasn't willing to even try and conquer hers, or maybe Naomi was just far braver than Effy would ever be.

"Its over," Freddie says sadly," She fucked off one night, left me alone in a hotel room with no explanation."

And its what Cook thought he wanted, thought that all this time he wanted Effy to fuck off and hurt Freddie the same way she hurt him but now it all feels so wrong. All he can do is throw his arm around Freddie's shoulders and pat him on the back, smiles a genuine smile at him to let him know that all is forgiven. Well maybe not all but enough for them to be friends again, and maybe this time they won't let a girl get in between.

Catches Naomi smiling at him from across the backyard a while later when him and Freddie are taking the piss just like old times, he nods back at her as if to say "yep its all right" and her smile widens before Emily walks up and pulls her off into the kitchen to get more drinks.

He expects things to go back to normal with Freddie back but learns quickly that things between them will most likely never go back to the way they were before. They don't speak about Effy, it's a rule between them that JJ set and it works, keeps things from getting awkward but Cook can't help but think the whole thing is one big lie. He knows Freddie thinks about her, sometimes catches him staring off into space and it doesn't take a genius to figure out what he's thinking about. Its so tangible the space that's between them now, and Cook can almost feel them drifting apart. Thinks that sometimes when people grow up they grow apart, thinking of it that way makes him feel less helpless against the whole thing.

So Freddie remains his best friend on paper, but its not until one night mid way through the summer that Cook realizes who his real best mate is. He's bored and sitting in his hole of a room trying to figure out something to do to pass the time. Takes out his phone and scrolls through the contacts, hovers over Freddie's name for a minute before shaking his head and continuing down and pressing send when Naomi's was highlighted, she answers after two rings.

"Hello," Cook hears Naomi's voice

"So Blondie, what are we doing tonight," Cook says, grinning at the look he knows is on Naomi's face in response to his use of her much hated nick name.

"How many times do I have to tell you not to call me that?" Naomi says.

"Well babes to be fair you spend enough time keeping your hair that color that I figured you'd embrace the nick name," Cook banters

"Oi who said i'm not a natural blonde," Naomi retorts, her voice trying to stay strong but Cook can hear her about to break.

"Oh come on Naomikins, I may be a little slow but I'm not completely retarded!" Cook exclaims," What next you're going to tell me that Emilio's hair is naturally that shade of red huh?"

Naomi just laughs in response and Cook feels his mood lifting for the first time that day, wonders what it is about Naomi that can just magically lift his spirits even by just hearing her voice over the phone.

"Besides we both know you're far to clever to be a natural blonde," Cook points out

"Well that is true, I am all seeing," Naomi says.

And she pauses for a minute, obviously getting lost in her thoughts about something, and Cook wants to ask her what she's thinking about but he's not sure if thats okay. Kind of likes that him and Naomi can understand each other without knowing every little detail of each others pasts, to him it makes their connection all the more real. Like some people can learn to know you, they can learn why you are the way you are from knowing about your experiences but then there's some people that can just look at you for the first time and can automatically understand why you are the way you are. Cook knows that for him Naomi is definitely the latter.

"So i'll ask again miss "all seeing" what are we doing tonight?" Cook asks

"Well why don't you pop by later and we'll figure something out," Naomi replies.

"Alright sounds good," Cook says, hanging up the phone after Naomi says bye.

When he shows up at the flat later Emily answers the door( yes he has a key but still despite what they say feels a little intrusive using it so he knocks) and eyes him curiously.

"Cook," Emily says, still standing in the doorway.

And Cook cant help but wonder what's going on because this is the first time he hasn't been invited inside with open arms. Quite the opposite actually, Emily is standing in the small space where she opened the door and isn't budging to make even the slightest amount of room to let him inside.

"All right Emily?" Cook asks, wondering why she's acting so strange.

"Yeah fine," Emily assures him," What are you doing here?"

She doesn't say it in a harsh or bitter way, just gentle curiosity lacing her tone with an under current of urgency to get his answer as if she's in a rush to get back to whatever she was doing.

"I spoke to Naomi earlier and she told me to pop by, though you guys might fancy a night out or something?" Cook explains.

"Listen I don't mean to be a bitch but I kind of wanted to spend tonight with Naomi, you know just the two of us," Emily says tentatively," Its just she got me these tassels for my bikes handle bars and I love them so I wanted to like you know show my appreciation."

And Cook just smiles fondly at her, because as if Emily could ever be a bitch, she was quite possibly the sweetest creature that roamed the earth only paralleled by perhaps puppies and koala bears.

"Sure," Cook nods in agreement," Not a problem Emilio, show your appreciation all night, maybe set up a camera so I can watch later."

Smiles when he gets the swat against his chest that he knew was coming.

"Its a surprise, I'm like cooking her dinner and stuff so she has no idea," Emily explains," So when you called she didn't know I had anything planned."

"Its a okay Em," Cook assures her," We'll just you know party tomorrow or something, we've still got half the summer ahead of us to get pissed so you go and have a good old lezzar time tonight okay."

Emily playfully rolls her eyes before nodding and then Cook says good bye and heads back in the same path he just walked. And thats the moment he knew that Naomi was more than just his friend, because he had been blown off by Freddie and plenty of other friends for their girlfriends and he wasn't ever left feeling so put out. Knows then that Naomi really is his best friend because he's actually a little down that he wouldn't be seeing her that evening and quite frankly he really never gave a fuck before.

Naomi calls the next day to apologize for canceling their plans even though it was completely unnecessary as she had done nothing wrong, but it makes Cook smile that she's still, under all the mocking and verging on abusive banter they exchange, considerate of his feelings like they actually matter to her. They make plans to go out later that evening, the whole group and its the first time since Freddie's come back that they are all out together, well excusing the barbecue that is.

He meets up with Naomi and Emily at the flat and is surprised to see Katie there as well, which is odd Cook thinks because Katie willingly inside Naomi's flat just seems a little too odd even for this group of people. Starts to feel like he's being set up when they walk to Keith's for cheap pre drinks and Emily grabs Naomi's hand and pulls her ahead leaving him and Katie lagging behind a little slower. And Katie's just looking at him, mirroring his own expression and they both start laughing at the same time.

"Not the most subtle are they," Katie laughs

"Just taking pity on us single folk," Cook replies, grinning and shaking his head.

"Fuck knows why, as if i'd ever go anywhere near you," Katie mocks," I'm Katie fucking Fitch! and god only knows where thats been," Katie continues pointing at his crotch.

"I love it when you talk dirty," Cook mocks.

"Fuck off," Katie says, smiling despite herself," Lets just go get fucked and pretend that this little set up never happened yeah?"

"Sounds fucking brilliant," Cook agrees.

Later when they've been at the club for a couple hours, dancing, drinking and having a generally good time, Cook pulls Naomi outside for a fag. Grabs her hand as not to lose her in the mass of bodies moving about in the club, ignores the spark her feels when his hand meets hers, puts it down to being pissing gone and imagining things. Once outside he leans against the wall and lights her fag for her.

"So nice try earlier babes," Cook says, exhaling a long stream of smoke into the air

"What?" Naomi mirrors his actions.

"Don't play dumb Naomikins, we both know it doesn't suit you," Cook laughs," Trying to pawn me off on Katie fucking Fitch," Cook says the last part in his Katie voice which makes Naomi burst into a fit of uncontrollable laughter.

"It went well then," Naomi says through her laughter.

"Fuck no, its a train wreck waiting to happen," Cook just shakes his head," What the fuck were you thinking."

"Me?" Naomi feigns innocence," It was Emily's idea, I told her she was fucking crazy but she was all like "Cook's lonely, Katie's lonely, it could work out", I knew it would be a disaster."

Cook eye's her a minute, trying to figure out what he had done to give Emily the impression he was lonely. Thought he was doing a better job of masking it but apparently not if she was able to see right trough the front.

"Who says i'm lonely?" Cook asks.

Naomi looks at him then, and its the same as it always is when she really looks at him, like she's looking right into his soul and there's no point even trying to pretend that he's completely happy when she just knows its total bull shit.

"You can fuck all the random slags you want Cook but it's never going to fill that place in your heart," Naomi says sincerely," Believe me I know, So you either need to fight for her or let her go completely because if you don't no one else will be able to make their way in there."

Cook shakes his head, goes to deny what she's saying even though he knows she's right. But really its not like he isn't fucking trying, he's been trying since he got back to Bristol to let Effy go but its not as easy as Naomi's making it out to be. And the other option, fighting for her as Naomi puts it, is complete shit as well because really what's the point she already made her choice and in doing so made his for him, that all he could do was let her go.

"I'm trying," Cook says simply.

"I know," Naomi nods, placing a comforting hand on his forearm," And i'm here to help in any way I can, I just want you to be happy Cook."

He smiles sincerely at her for a minute, before thinking that neither of them were even close to drunk enough to be having this conversation right now.

"Well I know one way you can help," Cook says wiggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"Perv!" Naomi exclaims," I'm not doing _that_!"

"Dirty mind Naomikins, I was going to say you could come inside with me and get proper pissed and have a good time, but well since you brought it up a willy waggle wouldn't be unwanted either," Cook mocks.

"Fuck off," Naomi laughs grabbing Cook by the arm and dragging him back towards the doors.

"You want me," he shouts over the music when they get inside, gets a glare over her shoulder and flipped off in response.

They do as he suggested, head straight to the bar and order shots, meeting up with Freddie and Thomas somewhere along the way. Then they make their way into the sea of bodies on the dance floor locating the group they were looking for and Cook smirks when Naomi wraps her arms around Emily from behind and buries her face in her neck. Because really could they be any more cliche, its a good cliche though Cook knows, hopes he finds it some day, someone who he can look at and know that she loves him more than anything. Decides that tonight he was going to take Naomi's advice and make the first steps towards letting Effy go.

Its much later when Emily comes back from the bathroom with a drunk Katie slung over her shoulder, barely conscious by the looks of it. She looks at Naomi apologetically, and its odd to Cook that she doesn't even have to say anything, Naomi just understands that she needs to take Katie home and that she'll probably stay at her mums that night to make sure Katie is alright. Naomi gives her a kiss, pats Katie patronizingly on the head and tells Emily to call her when she gets home so she knows they made it alright. And Katie and Emily disappear into a cab leaving Cook and Naomi to make the drunken trek back to the flat alone.

"My feet hurt," Naomi whines when they're about half way home.

Cook rolls his eyes, but to be fair she did wear heels, which must have been a bitch to walk around in all night.

"Come on then," Cook stops in front of her and crouches down slightly.

Naomi just stares at him, wavering slightly on her stance as she tries to figure out what he wants her to do.

"Get on then," Cook says, motioning for her to get on his back," I want to get home some time tonight and I'd rather not do it with you complaining the entire way."

Naomi smiles sleepily at him and does as she's told. And she's lighter than Cook thought she would be, figures since she was so tall that it would be more difficult to carry her but she wrapped nicely around him and it just fit. They're walking for about ten minutes when Cook hears her breathing even out and feels her head drop against his shoulder.

"Fucks sake Naomikins," Cook says even though he knows she can't hear him," Lets get you to bed then."

Getting the door open with the sleeping blonde on his back is no easy feat, but some how he's able to fish his keys out of his pocket and get the door open. Steps inside and looks at the stairs, knows he could wake Naomi up and make her haul her own ass up them but something stops him and with a slight groan he makes the journey towards Naomi's bedroom.

He's only been in here a couple times; kind of felt like it was Naomi and Emily's territory and did his best to avoid it. But its nice he thinks as she gently lies Naomi down on her bed, it's clean when compared to his room and there's pictures everywhere that gives it a homey kind of feel.

He watches Naomi stretch out, snuggling into her pillow and he can't help but smile, she looks quite cute when she's sleeping. Takes off her shoes for her and pulls the duvet up over her, gives her a kiss on the forehead before going to leave her to her sleep. Feels pressure tugging on his hand and turns to see if she's woken up.

"You know you're my best friend Cook," Naomi says sleepily, her eyes barely open but a warm smile on her lips.

He just smiles at her, give her hand a squeeze and watches as she falls back asleep almost instantly.

"You're my best friend to Naomikins," he says, hopes that she knows its true even though she's now asleep and didn't hear him say it.

As he curls up on the sofa again, like so many nights before he thinks back on the evening. Thinks back on what Naomi said earlier and smiles, realizing that maybe he really is happier than he thought he was. Thinks that maybe tonight with Naomi's help he put a few pieces of himself back together.


End file.
